Showing posts with label SmashWords. Show all posts
Showing posts with label SmashWords. Show all posts

Monday, July 2, 2018

Tenth annual Smashwords July ebook sale

It is once again time for Smashwords annual July ebook sale (July 1st to 31st).

(Some of these books are scheduled to be expanded and updated--if it has an asterisk [*], it is scheduled to be expanded and revised--in other words, if you want to get it cheap before the expansion, do it now because the price will be going up on these ebooks when I update them later.)


Discounted to $1.50 USD

Five Reasons Why Magic Fails

Golden Dawn Rituals--Three Officer Neophyte Script*

Rite of the Magical Images of the Wiccan Sabbats*

Witchy Rants (the Collected MDE Heaarthstone Community Church Newsletter articles)*

Denver Witch Quarterly: To Curse, Or Not To Curse--The Big Cursing Issue (Samhain/Yule 2016)

Denver Witch Quarterly: Wealth and the Lucky Witch (Imbolc/Ostara 2017)

Denver Witch Quarterly: Evil Witches Bind President Trump and His Administration--also Occult Writers and Payment (Beltane and Lithna 2017)

Gaius Corbin: Light Out of Darkness--Lux E Tenebris (Thelema and the Necronomicon)



Free ebooks on Smashwords

Denver Witch Quarterly: A Modest Magazine Proposal

MDE Hearthstone: Pizza Boxes on the Floor (2010)

MDE Hearthstone: Bad Monkey (2011)

MDE Hearthstone: Lunatic With a Soapbox (2012)

MDE Hearthstone: Biggest Witch on the Block (2013)

MDE Hearthstone: Thirteen Signs That Your Occult Teacher is Rotten (2014-2015)

MDE Hearthstone: Hex the Vote--Mad Uncle Morgan Talks About American Politics (2016)

Shakespeare's Monkey (a fiction and poetry collection)*

Esoteric Comedy Show: Assault With a Deadly Taco (Mad Uncle Morgan, I am--Your Face is Going to Freeze Like That)

Esoteric Comedy Show: Free Guns For Everyone--Lap Cats Are Good Too (A Big Gun Control Show)


This is one of my favorite book covers.

Saturday, July 1, 2017

Smashwords July ebook sale (50% off select books)

It is time for Smashwords biannual ebook sale.

The following of my books are available on Smashwords for a discount during the sale (July 1 to July 31).

Rite of the Magical Images of the Wiccan Wheel of the Year--A Golden Dawn Inspired Ritual (50% off--$1.50 USD): A ritual that was originally presented as an Open Full Moon ritual in Denver for the Hearthstone Community Church community, which was the first public showing of a set of eight magical images for the Wiccan sabbats.

Witchy Rants (50% off--$1.50 USD): An omnibus collection of the first four years of articles that I wrote for the Hearthstone Community Church newsletter. Highlights include insights on how occult and pagan leaders should act, how much astrology a witch should know, and why Golden Dawn studies matter to Wiccans.

Golden Dawn Rituals Volume One: Neophyte Ritual--Three Officer Version (75% off--$1.50 USD): A modified version of the Golden Dawn Neophyte (0=0) ritual for lodges who have a difficult time assembling the full set of eleven officers that traditional Golden Dawn ritual requires. This version divides the speeches and actions of the traditional officers among only three officers (Hegemon, Hiereus, and Hierophant), allowing a lodge that has an officer shortage to still accomplish the most important job of a Golden Dawn lodge--performing the actual lodge rituals to initiate members into the tradition.

Shakespeare's Monkey (50% off--$0.99 USD): A collection of short stories and poems written during my time at the Community College of Denver. My favorite of the collection is Eye of the Storm, a story about how a stolen laptop leads to madness, and threatens to unleash a long forgotten eldritch force upon the world.

Five Reasons Why Magic Fails (50% off--$1.50 USD): An extended essay talking about some of the reasons that magic spells fail to manifest results in the physical world, and how the inaction of the magician can result in a spell fizzling out.

In addition, back issues of the Denver Witch Quarterly are on sale (50% off--$1.50 each):

DWQ (Beltane/Lithna 2017)--Occult Writers and Payment & Witches Bind Trump: In this issue, we discuss whether occult writers should be allowed to make a profit from their writing, or if they should be required to give all their occult writing away for free to benefit the occult community. We also take a look at the global binding spell of President Donald J. Trump, and whether it is ethical. Contributors include myself (Morgan Drake Eckstein), Shea Herlihy-Abba, Scott Michael Stenwick, Jame Bull, Jonathan Barlow Gee, Lee Anderson, moon Gazer, A. J. Hallows, and Misha Sparks.

DWQ (Imbolc/Ostara 2017)--Wealth and the Lucky Witch: In this issue, we explore money, wealth, luck, and prosperity, and the magic necessary to obtain such. Plus editorials, poetry and fiction by A. J. Hallows, Broom Hill Crow, Erin Lale, and Shea Herlihy-Abba.

DWQ (Samhain/Yule 2016)--To Curse, Or Not to Curse (The Big Cursing Issue): In this issue, we explored the techniques and ethics of cursing and hexing. From the mass hexing of convicted rapist, swimmer Brock Turner, to the global bindings of ISIL, to revenge spells--cursing, hexing, and bindings are part of the toolbox of magicians and witches worldwide. Are public hexings merely exercising one's First Amendment rights? Or are curses actually effective enough to restrict the actions of individuals and organizations? Also included in this issue: Heavenly Watchers--using the Four Royal Stars (Aldebaran, Regulus, Antares, and Fomahault) and Sirius in astrology and magic.

Also available: Denver Witch Quarterly (Prospectus)--A Modest Magical Magazine Proposal (100% off--FREE!): In this first issue of the DWQ, I talked about my involvement with the small press Wiccan and pagan magazines of the 1990s, which inspired the creation of the Quarterly. I also provided information about the business practices, editing and payment policies of the Denver Witch Quarterly for potential contributors.

Besides these fine books, there is also a satiric piece on the Necronomicon: Light Out of Darkness--Lux E Tenebris (Thelema and the Necronomicon) at a 75% discount ($1.25 USD) by Gaius Corbin published by Salt Mine Publications (my own "publishing house"). Building upon the Simon (Avon) Necronomicon, this book claims that Aleister Crowley and the Golden Dawn had access to a more complete set of the fifty names of Marduk (actually fifty-one names) than the famed Lovecraftian authority, Simon Knight, did. If it was true, it would cast the early days of the famed esoteric Order, the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn, in a completely different light. Fortunately, we know that the Necronomicon is not a real book, and that all who believe in it are just fools and lunatics--and that no one in the Golden Dawn tradition has ever worked with the Cthulhu Mythos--and any evidence to the contrary should be burned at the next lodge BBQ's book-burning party and orgy. 

Sunday, March 5, 2017

Read an ebook week 2017 (Smashwords sale ends March 11)

It is Read an Ebook week.
Because ebooks are also books.
And in celebration, Smashwords is having their eighth annual Read an Ebook promotion (March 5 to March 11) where Smashwords authors are discounting some of their ebooks.

In my case, I am offering a discount on the following ebooks.

Witchy Rants--the first four year collection of the columns that I wrote for the monthly Hearthstone Community Church ("the Open Full Moon ritual people") monthly newsletter. Normally $2.99 USD--50% off (RAE50) $1.50 USD.

Five Reasons Magic Fails--an extended essay on five common reasons that spells fail to work. Normally $2.99 USD--50% off $1.50 USD.

Rite of the Wiccan Wheel of the Year (A Golden Dawn inspired Wiccan ritual)--a Wiccan ritual in which I combined the idea of astrological magical images with the eight Wiccan Sabbats. Normally $2.99 USD--50% (RAE50) $1.50 USD.

Golden Dawn Neophyte Ritual (Three Officer version)--an adaption of the traditional Golden Dawn Neophyte (0=0) lodge initiation ritual rewritten to be performed by only three officers (rather than the six to eleven officers that tradition usually calls for). Normally $5.99 USD--75% off (RAE75) $1.50 USD.

Shakespeare's Monkey--a collection of poems and short fiction that I wrote for a creative writing class at the Community College of Denver over a decade ago. Normally $1.99 USD--50% off (RAE50) $0.99 USD.

Also discounted are back issues of the Denver Witch Quarterly (a magazine devoted to paganism, Wicca, witchcraft, magick, and the occult). [Yes, we are accepting submissions!!!]

A Modest Magazine Proposal (DWQ Prospectus)--in which I talk about my plans for the Quarterly and my background in Denver's amateur pagan/Wiccan/magical magazine scene of the 90s. Includes important information for those who consider submitting material to the ezine. Normally $0.99 USD--FREE 100% off (SFREE).

Want to submit to the Quarterly? Email submissions to basttemple [at] msn [dot] com.
Denver Witch Quarterly most frequently asked contributor questions and answers.
To Curse, Or Not To Curse--The Big Cursing Issue (DWQ Samhain/Yule 2016)--in my primary editorial I ponder the ethics and technique of cursing a convicted rapist (who received an extremely light sentence) as a form of justice. Plus commentaries on Black Lives Matter (BHC); gun violence and gun control (MDE); Fiction: Short stories by A. J. Hallows (The Nightlight) and B. H. Crowley (Basil Unsealed). Plus a poem, Living Art by B. H. Crowley; Rituals: A fairy ritual in poetic form (MDE); An Anubis Samhain ritual and Honoring Horus on the Winter Solstice (Moongazer); Instructional article: Heavenly Watchers—Using the Four Royal Stars (Aldebaran, Regulus, Antares, Fomahault) and Sirius in astrology and magic (MDE); Interview with Gaius Corbin—The Voice of the Necronomicon Translation Project. Also included: Profit and Occult Writers—is it ethical for occult writers to make money? (MDE). Normally $2.99 USD--50% off (RAE50) $1.50 USD.

Wealth and the Lucky Witch (DWQ Imbolc/Ostara 2017)--Editorials: Don't tell me how to vote: Cause I never vote (BHC), Not a big enough safety pin (MDE); Fiction: All Sales Are Final (A. J. Hallows); Poetry: "A Kiss of Bliss, or Misery?" (The Broom Hill Crow),Body of a Goddess (Erin Lale), Blame It on the Wine. Or Kali. Or Both (Shea Herlihy-Abba), My Parents Don’t Like Kali ‘Cause She Drives a Mustang (Shea Herlihy-Abba); Instructional :Luck (Moon Gazer), Some money and luck spell tips and an ethical musing (MDE); Rituals: Shining the light on this year’s plantings at Imbolc (Moon Gazer), Ostara’s Plantings (Moon Gazer). Normally $2.99 USD--50% off (RAE50) $1.50 USD. 

Also discounted is a satire of the Simon Necronomicon--Gaius Corbin's Light Out of Darkness--Lux E Tenebris (Thelema and the Necronomicon): an humorous look at the claims of dark fluff occult books, their advertising and reviewing, and the occult world in general. Focusing on the fifty names of Marduk, this book lists the powers of the fifty-one names (yes, fifty-one), associating each name to verses from the Thelemic Holy Books, while making jokes about some of the odd things that has happened in the occult community. Normally $4.99 USD--50% off (RAE50) $2.99 USD.

My favorite Marduk name description--someone obviously has discovered how smart the dead really are.
How many occult personalities can you recognize?

Friday, May 13, 2016

Witchy Rants 99 cent special on Smashwords

Witchy Rants available on Smashwords and many other fine ebook retailers.
It is shameless self-promotion time.

Get the first four years worth of my Hearthstone Community Church newsletter columns for just 99 cents on Smashwords.

Promotional price: $0.99
Coupon Code: YK87H
Expires: June 13, 2016

Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Read my stuff on Scribd

Yes, I have my stuff up on Scribd. 
A brief reminder: If you have a Scribd subscription, you can read my stuff on Scribd. This includes the articles that I have written for the Hearthstone newsletter, my poetry (Grandma's Broom), some of my fiction (Shakespheare's Monkey), as well as my short e-article on the magical images of the Wiccan sabbats.

Thursday, July 23, 2015

How to be a self-published occult writer (a list of ideas to ignore)

So you want to be an occult writer? Because everyone who is involved in the occult wants to be a writer. Well, maybe not everybody--I understand that there is an occultist in Denmark that does not want to be an occult writer....but I think that person might be a myth. So how does one become a self-published occult writer? (Because it is a lot of work to get a publisher interested in your work---after all, the average occult book sales numbers are only in the low hundreds, even for a bestseller. There are also economic reasons to be self-published...but that is a whole another post to be written.)


Step one: Actually be an occultist.


This might seem funny to put the horse in front of the cart, but it is really helpful to actually be an occultist when writing about the occult. And I do not mean being a fly-by-night just-got-involved occultist (who knows all about the occult despite never actually opening up a book and/or never doing a single spell or ritual) or an armchair occultist (all theory--years and years of theory, but not a single working operation ever). I mean an actual occultist, someone with years of practical experience under their belt who can wing-it on pretty much on every possible ritual type without having to consult the internet or beg for spells (I would include books here, except that no one actually reads books any more....which should give you pause).


Step two: Establish a presence.


The sad part about being a writer who wants to sell books is that your marketing has to begin years before you publish your masterpiece. Yes, I know that you are special and unique. But you could be a living god and you will not sell copies of your book if no one knows who you are. You want to have your Facebook, your Twitter, and whatever other useless social media presence that you want to have established before you hit "publish."


Remember that as a self-published occult writer, you do not have a publisher to pimp out your work. Not that a publisher will do that much advertising for you--for some reason, publishers tend to do a small shout-out when a book is published, and then they generally ignore it...unless it becomes a hot seller, in which case, they were always fully supporting your work.


You are going to waste a lot of time on social media. And not just on marketing---people tune out the salespeople on social media, so you better be prepared to trot out those funny cat pictures. You want people to be following you, and generally well-disposed to you, so that when you pop out that occasional "please buy my book!," they do not immediately ignore you.

While you are wasting gobs of time, keep an eye out for successful occult writers. Notice their work habits, their general level of helpfulness, how they conduct themselves. Keep track of which ones are actually supporting themselves doing something non-occult related.

Step three: Research and experiment.

This ties back into step one, and cannot be stressed enough--working occultists have an edge. Part of your presence should be you pretending to care about others and trying to be helpful. One should not smile at the stupid numpties who are packed up to the rafters while suggesting helpful ways for them to ensure that they are visited by instant karma. Remember living customers potentially are repeat customers, and you want to test your stuff to ensure that no one loses a limb while performing your awesome rituals of power and magic.


Step four: Try to be original.

And fail miserably. Everything has been done before. The only thing that you really have to offer without robbing a cache of unpublished material from famous dead occultists is your unique voice. If your writing sounds like everyone else's, you are not being unique. A reader should be able to spot a piece of your writing without seeing your byline. Unfortunately, developing an unique voice requires lots of writing, way more than you thought it would take.


Step five: Wrestle with the keyboard.

Let's be honest---there are a ton of "occult writers" who do not write. Oh, occasionally one will be working on a book or an article, but most writers are just giving themselves a fancy title to reap the glories and fame that they think comes with the profession of being a writer. Of course, if that is you, then you are already long gone, having abandoned this post four steps ago---or perhaps at the very title of the post.

The harsh truth of the writing profession is that writers write. We write a ton of bad copy, a ton of bad ideas flow off of our fingers and into inky pixels, horrifying us when we make the mistake of reading our first drafts.


Ask yourself this: Can I survive the horrors of National Novel Writing Month? (For the unenlightened, the idea behind NaNoWriMo is to hack out, and I do mean HACK, fifty thousand words in the space of thirty days. While the focus of NaNoWriMo is on bad first drafts of novels [fifty thousand words being the lowest word count to qualify a work as a novel...according to some literary standard board which name I am too lazy to look up], the idea is the same. Can you crank out copy?

If the answer is No, you might still be able to be a writer. There are occult writers who have milked the fame of a single occult book--I know one whose work was simply photocopying the same set of rituals over and over again, and the fifty pages that were not the same ritual over and over again were also cribbed from someone else...and there are people who think that he is the greater occult writer and authority of our time (I kid you not).


But, and it is a mighty big BUT, most writers who are truly successful write a lot of copy. In order to be truly successful, you have to write a lot of words to feed the beast. Fifty thousand words a month is actually below what most professional writers (aka those who are paying their mortgage payment with their writing income) write per month. Professional writers write, just like professional plumbers plumb. 

Step six: Edit the crap out of that manuscript.


One of the harsh realities of being self-published is that you are responsible for the whole nine yards. This includes the editing of your book. Speaking as a nasty harsh book reviewer, I take away points for spelling, grammar, and punctuation mistakes. The more unreadable your work is, the more points I deduct---with a really badly edited and formatted book, it can cost the book five out of five stars.


So do yourself a favor and edit the crap out of your manuscript. Make it as easy and clear to read as you possibly can. You do not want your readers' eyes to bleed from merely reading the horrific way that you string words together. Save the eye bleeding for your revolutionary magical ideas.


Please note---you do not have to do your own editing. It is helpful if you can do your own editing, but know that a second (and a third and a fourth, etc. etc.) set of eyes is really helpful. Yes, it is going to cost to use an outside editor; but where there is a will, there is a way. Remember step two? Look how the successful writers are accomplishing this--some are paying for a service (who are they using? how much do they charge?) while others are using some form of beta-readers, or exchanging editing (because it is easier to see other people's mistakes). Also remember that the less painful it is for an outside editor to edit your work, the better (for instance, I charge extra for editing if it makes my eyes bleed).

Step seven: Putting it all together.


Also known as the joys of formatting. As I mentioned in the previous step, I deduct points when I review a badly formatted book. Again this is something that you can choose to do yourself, or farm out to someone else. I personally choose to format my own work, but I have also set up a front and back matter document to save me time during the formatting process. To the best of my knowledge, all the self-publishing platforms have a page (or a complete pdf) of formatting tips. Consider formatting as you write.


Step eight: Set up your accounts.

There are several companies that you can self-publish though. Or you can choose to self-publish though your own web page (this is not a good route if you have not built up an audience back in step two). The goal is to make your work available though as many sales platforms as you can. The nice thing about the current self-published world is that thanks to ebooks and POD (print-on-demand), you do not have to pay for a ton of books that you end up having to store and ship out of your basement.


The big daddy of all sales platforms is Amazon, of course--who else could it be?! I would avoid the exclusive option. For paper books, there is the Amazon-associated CreateSpace.

If you want to have a hardback book, there is only Lulu. I must admit that Lulu is on my low end of concern when it comes to uploading. For one, Lulu takes a bigger cut, and forces you to have higher prices (this is true even if you are not doing the paper route). Second, my experience is that Lulu just does not get random book paying traffic--in other words, for every copy you sell, you have to work hard to advertise.

There is Kobo, and Barnes &Noble, and quite a few other platforms...some of which I have never figured out how to set up an author account with. And each platform I have mentioned requires you to have a separate account, and upload an uniquely formatted document to (by unique, I mean that the various platforms have different requirements, including your adcopy refers only to their company...with one expectation).

 My preferred "I am a lazy writer who can't be bothered to upload to a dozen platforms" outlet as a self-publisher is Smashwords. The advantage of using Smashwords is that I get to use the same adcopy, a single document, and do not have to upload separately to Kobo and Barnes & Noble, and to other outlets that I see little, if any, sales from. Smashwords also distributes to a couple of outlets that I have never been able to create an author account for, or who absolutely refuse to deal with individuals authors (for instance, the library services). The disadvantage is that you have to give Smashwords, as well as the outlet that they distributed to, their percentage of the loot. But in my case, I would rather do that than spend a lot of time uploading to multiple platforms. The one platform that Smashwords does not support is Amazon (there is a long story there--bottom line Amazon wants the opportunity to trick you into exclusivity on their platform).

So for those who are curious, my priority to upload and distribute goes Amazon, then Smashwords, and Lulu on that cold day when I have nothing better to do.

At the very bottom of my list is a company called BookBaby. It is on the very bottom of my list, for the simple fact that it involves an upfront cost. Maybe you can afford it, and maybe you will sell enough copies to make a profit; but for myself, it just guarantees that I never will make my break-even point.


Step nine: Obtain a decent professional cover.

I suggest that you use frolicking unicorns with lots of rainbows. Or a black robed magician performing a human sacrifice. And hand-draw it even if you are not an artist. It will save you money...


...unfortunately, it will cost you lots of sales. Potential readers really do judge books based on their covers. When it comes to covers, unfortunately one needs to brace for the fact that you are going to have to pay for a professional cover. Fortunately, in step two, you might have learned of an artist or photography service that charges reasonable rates.


Step ten: Write adcopy.

Your adcopy, just like your book cover, is the first impression that a potential reader has of your book. Edit the crap out of it. And do not write it on the day that you are uploading (do as I say, not as I do). Remember that you need to know what category your book is in (research where other writers have placed their books--ex. Wicca is not the same as Satanism), and that you can use seven (Amazon) to ten tag words (Smashwords).


Step eleven: Upload files.

I mention my priority of who to upload to in step eight. A bit of advice that I give out from painful experience is: Block out a day to upload to a platform that you have never uploaded to before. You get better at uploading with experience, but the first time will be more painful than you think it will be.


Step twelve: Advertise and network.

This is where you abuse the presence that you set up in step two. Generally, devote as much time as you care to waste on it. I have discovered that a couple of dedicated Facebook pages and my FB wall, using a single ad, is more effective than most of the Facebook sales and promotion pages and groups are. A devoted audience is better than a random group of writers who are busy trying to sell you their own work. Throwing money at this problem comes only after you have shelled out for editing and a decent cover--no amount of money will move a fugly bad book without a dedicated audience. (Please note that bad books can sell if you have been a complete whore in step two. My proof? Fifty Shades of Grey.)

Step thirteen: Sell a single copy of your book.

And this is what it is all about. Selling a single copy of your book to someone who is not a close personal friend, lover, or close relative. Ideally, you want the joy of selling a copy to someone that you have never met or interacted with. And note that some writers never accomplish this step.

Step fourteen: Claim to be a famous best selling occult author.


We both know that it is a lie; but if you don't poke fun at me when I do it, I will try to return the favor. After all, we have both seen each other's Amazon sales rank (with some basic math, I can figure out your daily sales); therefore, we both know that we wasted a whole bunch of time that would have been better spent writing erotica or flipping burgers. But what us writers know, our adoring fans do not need to know.

Monday, March 4, 2013

Smashwords Read an Ebook Week

Yes, I am involved in the creation of this ebook.
It is "Read an Ebook Week" until March 9th 2013 on Smashwords.

This time around, I have three ebooks discounted during the annual Smashwords promotion.

Five Reasons Why Magic Fails is 50% off (promotion price $1.50--normally $2.99).

Golden Dawn Rituals--Volume One--Neophyte Ritual (0=0) Three Officer Version is 75% off (promotion price $1.50--normally $5.99).

And the first volume of the pagan/Wiccan friendly children series that I am doing the covers for, Meet Turtle Monkey is 50% off (promotion price $1.50--normally $2.99).

Thursday, February 21, 2013

Bad cover for Lunatic with a Soapbox

An ugly temporary cover for Lunatic with a Soapbox.
The other day, I decided that considering that the third collection of articles that I wrote for the Hearthstone Community Church's monthly newsletter was ready, it was time to write the introduction and slap a temporary cover on the ebook, so that I could upload it to Smashwords.

I have mixed feelings about this cover. Mainly about the background. I originally planned on having this cover photograph taken downtown where all the street preachers do their work. Unfortunately, that is a two person job...and well, everyone knows how hard it is to get schedules to match up with one another.

The pose itself is more or less what I originally planned. Before anyone asks, I know--one should not mix an Inner Order tool with an Outer Order robe. But until I can afford to replace my Temple garb, this is what I have to work with. Besides, I am not sure that a white robe, or even a red one, would work any better for the final photo.

What I really think that I need is a big howking-a** pentacle. You know the type--one you can see from space. But I do not own one of them. I wonder if a "Beware of dog" sign would be an ok substitute. Probably not. (The house came with a Beware of dog sign; it is currently in storage...because I did not know what else to do with it.)

So anyways, the collection of articles that I wrote in 2012 for the Hearthstone newsletter is now available on Smashwords (99 cents), and should be available in a couple of weeks on Barnes&Noble and Apple.

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Everything is going forward!!!

Turtle Monkey attacks with roly-polies! No Mercury retrograde involved.
Welcome to the "Everything is going forward" 2013 edition. Or at least, all the planets are going forward (no retrogrades) from January 30th to February 17th, 2013. Enjoy the next two weeks because the next time we have an all-direct period is late December 2015 (and it will be a short week).

[That is if you account for all the modern planets, including Pluto...which is still a planet in my book. If you just use the seven classical planets, you get a few more all-direct periods.]

And what does this mean?

Absolutely nothing, other than anyone blaming some crap on some planet or another being retrograde is dumb-ass wrong. Of course, most of the time that you hear someone blame something on a retrograde planet, they are being an ass-hat. (If I had a dollar for every time I heard something being blamed on a planet driving the wrong way down the zodiac highway...especially Mercury...well, I wouldn't have to write erotica to make money.)

Oh, I imagine that there are some magicians who are going to be practicing some specialized work over the next two weeks. But if you do not already know what type of work you would do in all-direct period, odds are that you can't learn enourgh astrological magic fast enourgh to take advantage of this period. And no, I am not telling you what my special experiment is for this cycle--it is a secret method, after all.

But other than that, everything will be normal--as in "generally messed up" because mankind probably should have stayed in the trees. Of course, that last opinion might be simply because I have been drawing a lot of monkeys lately. And I like monkeys more than some humans I know, especially those humans I consider ass-hats. For that matter, I like spiders and roly-polies better than some humans. (Centipedes and milipedes still must be nuked from space--there is no excuse for them.)

Anyways, enjoy your all-direct period. It is the perfect time to learn that not everything that goes wrong is the fault of a retrograde planet. Especially when there are human beings involved.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

May you never...

Bad Monkey is available on Smashwords for 99 cents.
[The following is an article that I wrote for the November 2011 Hearthstone Community Church's newsletter. It is reprinted in Bad Monkey: The Collected 2011 Hearthstone Community Church Articles.]

It is that time of year again when American society reminds us to count our blessings, time for the penultimate holiday of the year, Thanksgiving. This is a holiday that tends to be all about food. Personally, I find that all holidays involving food to be fascinating; my interest extends to weddings and funerals also. If there is food involved, you have my attention. I blame this fascination on my childhood.

I grew up poor. Well, poor for an American. Let us be honest; when you look at the overall standard of living that humanity has enjoyed down throughout the ages, few Americans can be considered poor based on global and historical standards. So when I say that I grew up poor, let me be clear: there were holes in the roof; we accepted donations from the local food bank, and my school clothes were bought at yard sales.

I suspect that this fact, the fact that so few Americans are really poor, is the reason that we had to create the mythical holiday of Thanksgiving. And let's be honest, our image of Thanksgiving is mythical. It is very unlikely that a society that was on the verge of extinction by starvation would have such a large feast as depicted in the American mythology. There was probably no turkey. Personally, I tend to imagine the feast as some eels and a few ears of corn. And if the Pilgrims did get a windfall of food, they probably rationed it out as long as they could.

Thanksgiving is the feast that the Pilgrims would have liked to have. It is much like the number of feasts that one encounters in fairy tales, chivalry tales, and Northern mythology. It is not that people were constantly having feasts; it is that they would have liked more food on a daily basis.

One of the things that I know from my impoverished childhood is that at a certain level of need, there arises a constant concern about where your next meal is coming from. You never really get over it. It is one of the reasons that I automatically hate politicians who want to get rid of subsidized school breakfast and lunch programs. Growing up, I was constantly hungry. The free breakfast at the local school was a meal that I could count on. I remember this when a politician claims that schools are only for instruction, and presume that the politician needs to be voted out of office.

This impoverished background colors my views of the current political and economic environment. I am suspicious of any solution that shifts more of the economic burden onto the poor, but I am equally leery of any protest screaming that the rich are hogging all the wealth that does not contain anyone that I would classify as being truly poor. Through most of my childhood, my parents wondered how they were going to keep a roof over their children's heads, where the next meal was coming from, and if they could afford to turn on the heat.

My background also colors how I react to the most common blessing in Wiccan ritual (or at least, it is the most common blessing that I have encountered). "May you never hunger; may you never thirst." Having been poor, this blessing, in many ways, represents the height of human civilization as far as I am concerned. You can talk about spiritual experiences and personal growth; but let's be honest, I have always been more interested in food.

Of course, as a Golden Dawn member, I would modify the blessing slightly. (The Golden Dawn counterpart of Cakes and Ale, the Mystic Repast involves a rose, a lit lamp, bread and salt, and a cup of wine when done according to the official ritual documents.) Or maybe the modification is because I grew up poor. Whatever---it does not matter. What matters is that I extend this blessing to you this holiday season.

May you never be ignorant; may you never be cold; may you never hunger; may you never thirst; may you always be thankful. So mote it be. Happy holidays.

Sunday, July 8, 2012

Smashwords Summer Winter Sale

Smashwords is doing their annual sitewide Summer/Winter sale (summer for us in the northern hemisphere/winter for those in those in the southern hemisphere) until July 31, 2012.

This time around, three of my ebooks are discounted fifty percent off (coupon code--SSW50).

Five Reasons Why Magic Fails--$2.50 (normally $4.99).

Shakespheare's Monkey (poety and various short stories)--$1.50 (normally $2.99).

Golden Dawn Rituals Volume One--Neophyte Ritual: Three Officer Version--$3.00 (normally $5.99).

Be sure to use the coupon code (SSW50).

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Salt Mine Publications (Smashword sale and a free book by Alex)

A few years ago, I decided that if I was to ever run a publishing house that I would call it Salt Mine Publications. This past weekend, this insane dream took a step forward towards actually happening. Details are still being worked out, but it looks like I am going to be entering the occult ebook market as a publisher.

In related news, Smashwords is having their annual Summer/Winter sale. Two of my ebooks (Five Reasons Why Magic Fails and Shakespeare's Monkey) are fifty percent off until the end of July 2012. In a couple of days, I hope to get version one of the ebook edition of the Three Officer Version of the Golden Dawn Neophyte ritual also up on Smashwords.

In other news, Alex Sumner is giving away copies of his ebook novella Shall We Kill The President? (Just in time for Independence Day. Alex also has a couple of ebooks in the Smashwords Summer/Winter sale (I forgot which titles).




Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Secret Chief (Zealot's Dictionary)

Secret Chief: 1: A person who secretly cooks and is ashamed that of the fact that they cannot spell the word “chef” properly. 2. An entity, typically in the form of strong spirits and an Ouija board, occasionally in the form of a lunatic sitting outside the local Quik-Mart, who is willing to tell you all the secrets of the universe in exchange for complete silence and obedience. A Secret Chief will authorize any misbehavior of their favorite student as long as they are not required to appear in court to prove their existence. 3. A cat.

[All the Zealot's Dictionary definitions are available in a single ebook on Smashwords--just 99 cents. Remember if you buy it on Smashwords, you get access to all future expansions...because we know that new definitions are sure to happen simply because of human nature.]

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Structure of esoteric Order and lodge egregores

Structure of the Egregores of Esoteric Orders & Lodges
One of the things that I am doing this summer, besides cobbling together collections of previously written fiction (such as Shakespeare's Monkey) and hacking out more fiction, is slowly cranking out the material necessary to get the Three Officer Version of the Golden Dawn Neophyte Ritual back in print. As many of you know, at a certain point, Lulu decided to change the rules for the type of cover I had on it, and I suddenly needed to add 46 more pages.

Part of the additional material I am thinking of including is a brief summary of the energetic structure of egregores. Or maybe, it will be a stand-alone article (really short ebook). I haven't decided yet.

Of course, there will be a horde of people saying that I know nothing about the subject, but what else will be new? Oh, the fact that they will point out that I only write about the occult to make money. Sadly, I have yet to figure out how any occult writer actually makes money writing about the occult. Maybe, I am little slow in the head.

Anyway, I thought that perhaps my regular readers would like to see the (oh so bad, gee, I do not know one side of the pencil from the other) illustration I was thinking of using for the material that I am writing on the structure of esoteric egregores. Click on the picture to embiggen it.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Five Reasons Why Magic Fails coupon code

Five Reasons Why Magic Fails available on Smashwords.
Here is a Smashwords coupon code for the ebook (article) Five Reasons Why Magic Fails (50% off--$2.50) good until April 29th, 2012.

HD89E

Go to the Smashwords, and buy a copy of Five Reasons Why Magic Fails, click here.

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Smashwords Sale until March 10 2012

Five Reasons Why Magic Fails
Smashwords is having a site-wide sale until March 10, 2012. One of my ebooks (really an article) is included in the sale---you can get Five Reasons Why Magic Fails for half off ($2.50) until the end of the sale by entering coupon code REW50 at the checkout. This small ebook sums up the five most common reasons why practical magic fails---at least according to my experience.

Five Reasons Why Magic Fails.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Article and Book disclosures

Another disclosure statement---I will NOT be adding disclosure statements to my articles and books. The reasons for this is that A) I am sick and tired of making disclosure statements, especially ones that undermine my own authority and serve no purpose other than advertising an Order that I have no connection with, and B) my readers should be able to figure out from my public profiles, my blogs, and the "putting stuff in context" statements that I have a personal bias and limited knowledge about the stuff I am writing about.

Therefore, if I write about Tarot, I am not going to say that I know nothing about Tarot and that the reader needs to go to someone else for the real initiated secrets. Same goes for Norse runes, alchemy, magic, Golden Dawn, RR et AC, geomancy, and everything else that slips my mind at this moment.

Please note that no one has said I need to do this personally; but given the Golden Dawn information police views about other writers, I thought that I would beat the rush and just issue my warning that I am not going to undermine my own authority and provide them with free advertising.

Note: The membership of the Golden Dawn information police changes on a regular basis. It seems to consist of people who think that they are the only people who really know what the various esoteric traditions are all about.

Monday, November 14, 2011

Two repeated advertisements

Apologies to all who have already seen these two advertisements; but due to a hiccup with Facebook and Networked Blogs, those who follow this blog through Facebook did not see these two important advertisements.

One, my wife is now selling wheel thrown pottery in her Esty shop: Celtic Soul Jewelry and Pottery.

Royal Blue Mortar and Pestle.
She currently has one urn, four mortar and pestles, two herb jars, and a pair of candlestick holders available.

Two, I am giving away for free an ebook on Smashwords, Four Cornerstones, collecting the three best articles I wrote for the Hearthstone Community Church's Newsletter, as well as a reprint of the very first article that I wrote for the pagan/Wiccan/esoteric community. Did I mention that it is free? All I ask is that people give me some feedback on how horrible the meatgrinder conversion tool is treating the text.

Four Cornerstones available for free on Smashwords.