Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Morgans rule of political realism

Morgan's rule of political realism: If an underhanded method of hoodwinking the public has any likelihood of actually occurring, then it did.

Drake's corollary to Morgan's rule: All politicians are dishonest.

Blackbeard's corollary to Drake's corollary: Especially when large sacks of gold or voters are involved. 

My best gun control quotes



 Did you know that I have done twenty posts on this blog about guns, gun violence, and gun control?

Why the fuck so many lately? Oh yeah, gun violence!
 Here is a selection of my best quotes on the subject:


I have a theory about gun violence in America: We have so much gun violence because guns are so easy to obtain. And there is no shortage of ammunition either. 


Here is a cracked ball prediction: If someone starts shooting in a mall, and there are a dozen other people who are armed, you are going to end up with three dozen friendly fire hits before the smoke clears.





Has anyone actually seen me use the sentence, "We need to ban guns"? Arguing for better gun control laws does not mean that I am arguing for banning of all guns.
October 16, 2015

Any excuse to scream "State rights! And they are coming to take away your freedoms!" is a good one, right?

The problem with cults is that they look remarkably like legitimate religions, political groups and fraternal organizations; or at least until the Kool-Aid, guns and multiple wives are brought out into the open. One of the best things to know about cults are the signs of what a cult act like. Remember a cult always hides behind a cloak of respectability, clear up to the day that the FBI kicks in the door. One of the ways to check out how cultish an organization is to use the Bonewits Cult Evaluation Frame
September 3, 2009


One thing that the wingnuts point out is that taking away guns will not decrease the number of overall violent incidents. Once no one has guns, we will all just buy hammers, swords, and poison, and continue to gleefully eliminate those people we feel are too stupid to live. And they are right, violence won’t disappear, we will just have to go back to bashing people’s heads in with rocks. Because of us non-gun owners being so violent, gun owners have to keep their guns. They are not actually concerned about other gun owners because they all think that they are the quickest most accurate shooter this side of Mars. No, it is only those of us who will sneak up behind a rock that you have to worry about because no one has ever outlawed rocks in human history.



Today, I heard that forty-three toddlers shot people last year. This is an outrage. We need to do what the NRA tells us is the ideal solution to this problems. Remember, only a good baby with a gun can stop a bad baby with a gun. We must arm all babies and we must do it now!


I was taught that if a gun is involved in a non-hunting situation, then someone is going to die. Period. End of story. Because guns outside of a wilderness situation only have one purpose--and that is to kill.

When you argue self-defense, you are arguing that you should be allowed to kill someone. When you argue that you need a gun to protect yourself from the government, you are arguing that you should be allowed to kill someone. When you argue that teachers should carry guns, you are arguing that they should be allowed to kill someone. And adding more guns to a situation just means that more people are going to die.

Please note this is why I am never surprised when a cop kills someone. In my mind, the instant a cop pulls a gun out, someone is going to die. Because a gun only has one purpose---to KILL. In fact, I am surprised that more people are not killed by cops.
November 19, 2015


Gun control ideally is not about taking away everyone's guns; it is about keeping them out of the hands of people who are prone to go up in a clock tower and shooting random people because they are having a bad hair day.


Being enlightened and magically aware does not mean that you have to personally get involved in saving the world, especially if it involves you having to pick up a gun, so that you can shot someone in the face. 

You wanna know why I know that we are never going to do anything about guns?

Five words. Sandy Hook--twenty kids dead.
 
For all you gun nuts and Second Amendment fetishers, shut the f*** up. The government is not going to come and take your precious p***** substitutes away. President Obama is not going to declare martial law and become President-for-Life (Trump does that on September 2024--read your future history books people!). Your guns are perfectly safe, and you can buy hundreds and thousands more of them and stockpile them in some strange Satanic Waco James Town cache along with the cherry Kool-Aid that you love so much.


Raise Your Wands Gun Week! Coming soon to a cult near you!