Thursday, May 26, 2016

Predicted Trump in 2011

Earlier this year, people got annoyed with me when I started to make President-for-Life jokes about a certain orange skinned billionarie wig model. Some even told me that he would not even get nominated. And lo, and behold, guess who nailed down the GOP nomination? Yes, that is right--I got it correct! All hail the orange skinned billionaire wig model that is soon to be your President--For. The. Rest. Of. Your. Life. 

Trulhu for the win!
For the record, I started to make fun of soon-to-be President Trump back in 2011. Proof of that can be seen here and there on my list of badly written and formatted blogs.

And this is called Predicting the Future by assuming that the universe is ran by a writer with an evil sense of humor. Or as we will say it after Trump gets elected, a perfectly rational sense of humor based on the fact that sheeple knew what a totally awesome guy he was, and how he will save them from the evils of the Democrats, raping Mexicans and these bomb-encrusted Muslims! All hail Trump! Free guns for everyone! 'Murica is Great again! Welcome to the 1950s the remake.

So based on this comedic divination technique, I am predicting that the honorable Donald Trump, the one with the very hot daughter that he would totally date if he could, with the enormous hands, and who the tentacles love, he gets along great with the tentacles, the tentacles love him, will be elected the forty-fifth President of the United States. And that he will make a boatload of money from his Presidency, mostly by overcharging the Mexicans to build a wall to keep the Mexicans (and Muslims) out of Totally Not Racist, Not Queerist, Pro-Jail For Making Jokes About the President 'Murica. 


And that there is a 50/50 chance that Sarah Palin will be the next Vice-President.

And now welcome to Dilemma Time, that game show that puts you between a rock and a crazy place. Do you vote for Trump and make Mad Uncle Morgan right? Or do you vote for any dead donkey to prevent Mad Uncle Morgan from being right? It is your choice America! Choose wisely. 


Monday, May 23, 2016

May Day TBH followup

Maybe the cat sees color, maybe it doesn't.
Earlier this month (during the latest Tarot Blog Hop), I posted a black and white outline of an oracle card I was working on. Here is how the colorized version of the card looks.

Thursday, May 19, 2016

Attention Tarot bloggers! (Want to blog hop with us?)

 Are you a blogger that writes about Tarot? If so, do you want to get involved in a community of Tarot bloggers? If the answer is yes, then now is a good time to join the Tarot Blog Hop community on Facebook. 

Eight times a year (about every six weeks), the members of the Tarot Blog Hop community get together and do a common theme blog chain.

The theme for the next Tarot Blog Hop (June 21, 2016), which is being wrangled by me, is Junk Mail Tarot, a "Tarot art project for non-artists."

The idea is to take some photos and/or artwork that someone else has done, and turn it into a Tarot card. Yes, I am assuming that you get junk mail and/or magazines. If not, there is plenty of random photos on the internet, including stock photo sites. And then, there are the meme making sites.

Here are some examples.

Examples of Junk Mail Tarot. 
  Created using index cards, some photos from magazines, and a pen.

More examples of Junk Mail Tarot. 
. Same idea.

These could have been Junk Mail Tarot. 
While this looks like actual artwork, bear in mind that these two cards are actually based on a scene from an old TV show, and a urban fantasy book cover. I could have just as easily did them with screenshots or photocopies.

Now for the writing part...because search engines love indexing text and words and stuff like that.

For the writing part, talk about why you choose the images, and how you are associating them to a particular Tarot card.

Now, for the rules:

Bloggers must take part in two hops per year. Bloggers must post their posts at the same time. Yes, some people end up posting at 2 am---after all, it is an international blog chain. Bloggers must link to their neighbors in the chain, as well as the Master List. Bloggers must comment on five other blogs. And the coordination of this blog chain happens on Facebook.

SIGNUP DEADLINE for the June 21, 2016 blog hop is June 16, midnight MDT

You can find the Tarot Blog Hop Facebook group here. (Look in your "other" folder for a private message from one of the moderators asking you to confirm that you have a Tarot blog.)

Monday, May 16, 2016

Support me on Patreon (because you know that you love me)

If you love the work that I am doing, and you know that you do, you can now make a monthly donation to me on Patreon.

Patreon is a crowdfunding site where people make monthly donations to creative people (writers, artists, comedians, etc.) to help them make ends meet--because being creative is not the gold mine that certain people think it is. The number of creatives that make decent money doing art is less than one percent.

And yes, I know. No one should support my work because I spend too much time making fun of other people, and my artwork sucks, and my writing blows, and whatever else my critics say.

To my critics, I say--bite me!

There are rewards for supporting me on Patreon, including early access to projects that I am working on.

So for just a dollar a month, you can sponsor a lunatic--that would be me, Mad Uncle Morgan, and encourage me to continue doing what I do best. Thank you for your continued support. 


Friday, May 13, 2016

Witchy Rants 99 cent special on Smashwords

Witchy Rants available on Smashwords and many other fine ebook retailers.
It is shameless self-promotion time.

Get the first four years worth of my Hearthstone Community Church newsletter columns for just 99 cents on Smashwords.

Promotional price: $0.99
Coupon Code: YK87H
Expires: June 13, 2016

Sunday, May 1, 2016

May Day May Day

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Karen Sealey, the wrangler of this edition of the Tarot Blog Hop, noticed that the word "may" gets used a lot in Tarot readings. She set us all loose playing with that word. I ended up with the word "may" becoming "maybe." And then two horrible poems, a horrific Tarot card, and a rather odd oracle card came into being. I just hope that it is all punny enough to make Karen happy. 

Schrodinger Tarocat

Schrodinger Tarocat

A box
A magical box
Full of life and death
Silly scientist
You don’t get to decide
Peek all you want
Flip those cards
Probabilities abound
My nature is indecision
Meow over matter

Half empty
Half full
Half on the floor
Half water
Half milk
Half bourbon
Half poison
Does not matter
Perception bounces
Gravity falls

The cards say everything
The cards say nothing
The cards come out of a box
Shuffle, shuffle, shuffle
Deal them out
Gaze upon your own box
Is it full of life?
Is it full of death?
Half empty, half full
Pick your own box

Ten of May Bees
Ten of May Bees

You may meet
A tall dark beekeeper
Or you may not
You may become rich
Buying or selling honey
Or maybe not
You maybe sting by a bee
Or maybe you will crush it
May, may not, may, may not,
Maybe, maybe, maybe
The deck is full of maybes
A hive of May Bees
A bouquet of Mayflowers
A sprinkle of May showers
A week of Maydays
And hopefully pints of May honey
Maybe, maybe, maybe
May Bees, Blessed May Bees

Thanks for reading. Have a good May Day (Mid-spring, Beltaine, or whatever it is in your neighborhood). 

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Thursday, April 21, 2016

Dont owe Prince a damn thing

My response to someone saying that as a writer, I owed Prince a debt because he fought censorship.

"Luckily for prince, other artists can sell things like grimoires or explicit romance novels without being banned/forced to do some other shit to keep the lights on."

You have no idea about the book market, do you? Most writers have a day job to keep the lights on because they will make less than a thousand in royalties. Same goes for most artists and musicians. Even today, all the book outlets can ban your book for absolutely no reason, and you can't do anything about it.

The only artists that Prince helped were artists who were or became famous enough to make so much money that it was stupid for outlets not to sell their stuff.

Small timers still suffer from the whims of the market and have to worry that some Christian will start screaming, "Will someone think of the children?!"

As an erotica writer, my market was cut by over 90% because companies decided to listen to those who supported censorship. Prince did not help me one bit.

The quickest way to get banned is to start selling like hotcakes--because then some Christian is likely to get upset.