Hierarchical backlash

Lately, I have been watching a lot of bickering between some of the Golden Dawn leaders, teachers, and writers. It is pretty normal as far as I am concerned. And when one got nasty, it merely pointed out that he was the type of Adept that I came up the ranks surrounded by.

(For those who do not know my background, I do not believe in the saintly Adept, who believes in thinking that kind thoughts will change the universe. Why? Because the Adepts in my mother lodge were not of that kind, rather they were people capable of great anger who thought that members of the RC occasionally have to roll up our sleeves and get our hands dirty if we want to see changes in the world.)

For me, the reactions were normal when you account for human nature and politics. There is also one other thing that I am accounting for that many people may be overlooking.

And that is that if you hold an active place in the Hierarchy, you suffer a certain amount of backlash when things impact your egregor. If people attack your branch of the tradition's way of doing things, and your egregor reacts as if it is being attacked, then you react as if you are being attacked. It is one of the side-effects of being part of the system, and something you have to watch constantly as an officer. And there are certain officers of the system that are almost guaranteed to react when changes happen to the egregor of their group, and when it is criticized.

I know this from personal experience. I have, on occasion, occupied one of those offices.

Unfortunately, not a lot of people seem to be aware of this side-effect. So when an officer reacts badly, they rack it up to them being a jerk. Before racking it up to that, one should step back and ask if it is completely their reaction, or could part of it be the egregor acting like a drunk in a bar.

(I am sorry, but personal experience has taught me that the egregores of the various Golden Dawn groups act like mentally unstable drunks on the bad days. I don't like the imagery any more than you do. It is just that one needs to be aware of this.)

When I start acting badly, and most people have seen me explode for no apparent reason, I have to ask myself:

1: Is this my bad upbringing? Could this be my mother talking?

2: Is this the egregor, the group mind, of my branch and lodge reacting?

3: Or is this me?

In most situations, it is always best to count to ten kabbalistically before firing off a response.

And having experienced this side-effect first hand, I have to wonder how much of this latest spat is politics, backlash, and personal reactions. I have my bets, but can't prove anything.