Trade secrets (31-HP Day 26)

Coffee stained
Enciphered and encoded
Old and browned
Handwritten recipes

Weigh and measure
Pound and dollop
Pinch and handful
Exactness counts

Fresh berries
Crushed and mashed
Staining hands
Blue and purple

Fresh onions
Skinned and peeled
Tears forming
Yellows and tans

Cactus lobes
Smuggled in a box
Covered with beetles
A delicate red

Pound of ancient
Dried up mummy
Such a delicious
Shade of brown

Old ways remembered
An artist's craft
Original colors
All handmade

Drunk or death trap (31 Days of Halloween Kitties Day 25 Year 3)

Drunk kitty debates having a snack.

Is it a drunk kitty dressed as a lamp shade? (I think that it is a lamp shade...if it is not a lamp shade, I have no clue what it is actually supposed to be.) Or a lamp shade death trap for birdie? Or both? I hope that the photographer rescued the bird--though one has to wonder why you would not rescue the bird from the impeding cat of doom, rather than take a picture...then again, I have known a couple of birds that were quite good at defending themselves (to the point where you wondered if you might have to take the cat to the vet to stitch up their nose).

Lucky penny #1 (31-HP Day 25)

Go ahead and share the lucky penny.

Here is a lucky penny
Pass it on and on
If you don't,
Imps will invade
Your underwear drawer

Here is a lucky email
Forward it to five more
Multiplied by five squared
If you don't,
No more puppies

Here is a lucky elephant
Pass it on to a friend
Never mind your back
And just duct tape the hernia
After all, it is a lucky elephant

[This poem is part of my ebook, Grandma' Broom and Other Witchy Poems available on Amazon.]

Another death at my house (31-HP Day 24 & 31 Days of Halloween Kitties Day 23)

A picture of Merlin from the Presidential election.

Apologies to both those who have been following the 31 Halloween Poems and/or year three of 31 Days of Halloween Kitties, but I am a little off today. Last night, one of my cats, Merlin passed away in his sleep. He had been ill for awhile, and try as we might he wasn't getting any better despite getting medicine from the vet.

This afternoon, me and my wife buried him out in the yard near a stand of catnip--he was the biggest catnip fiend in the house. So this is the fifth cat that is buried out in the yard (the seventh that has died here since we brought the house eleven years ago). The cat ghosts here outnumber the human ghosts.

Speaking of human ghosts, today I learned of an expensive (twelve dollars for a basic search) website to see if someone had died in your house. It is only for the United States; and no, I did not attempt a search...because twelve bucks for a basic search seems a little pricey to me (and I am not sure how reliable it would be--after all, I know that there are still a lot of records that have not been digitalized...thanks to my time in the UCD history department and researching stuff at the Western History collection at the Denver Public Library).

So hopefully, I am back on my game tomorrow, and will return you to back to the regularly scheduled programs of poems and cat pictures. And if not, I know that you will understand.

Select models (31-HP Day 23)

All types of models
We have today
Slim to husky
Wide range of colors
Basic blacks,
Whites and greys
And more exotic reds

Some select models
Are self-sufficient
Needing only kitchen
And bathroom privileges
Perfect for workers
Gone for endless hours
Operate best in twos

Some select models
Are mischievous
Impish souls
Tricking all in the house
Quality checking
Softness of beds
And toilet paper

Some select models
Are fabulous
Super-models
And show stoppers
A little extra cost
A lot of extra care
Beauty has a price

Some select models
Are coddlers
Who will greet you
After a long day
Insisting relaxation
And heart-felt kisses
Reduce stress levels

What model is this?
No way to tell
Until you get home
Cats much like women
Rely on appearance
To lure you in
Later surprising you
With their secrets

Witch apprentice (31 Days of Halloween Kitties Day 22 Year 3)

Is your cat your witch apprentice?

Sometimes I think that my cats are taking notes while I am doing rituals. Like yesterday, during my daily performance of the Lesser rituals and the Middle Pillar, the two youngest cats (they are both three years old--and brothers) just sat there and watched me. I am positive that they were taking notes, and judging me on my performance. Now, there are some that might say that they are learning magic from me, and therefore are apprentices. My personal view is that they are probably Secret Chiefs (as my regular readers know).

Joy-ride (31-HP Day 22)

It will be fun!
Live a little!
Don't be a muggle!

Not fun
Could die
Muggles not bad

Everyone does it!
Need to see London!
Perfectly safe!

See no one else
More like barf over London
Almost hit a jet

Nice broom!
Antique?
You're a natural!

Discontinued Pam-Am 93
Fire hazard
Hanging upside down

Ain't this fun?
Look muggles!
Let's buzz them!

It is horrible
Let's get caught
They had cameras

Don't worry!
Muggles easily confused!
What's instant-gram?

We're so grounded
Viral photos
All over the news

Oh dear!
They look upset!
It is his fault!

Please ground me
I barfed a whole lot
All over London