Monday, March 28, 2011

Adventures with oatmeal

My wife seems to be performing science experiments using oatmeal. Or at least, that is how I am going to think about it for the next couple of minutes.

A few years ago, a friend of my wife taught her the trick of putting oatmeal in those travel coffee mugs (gee, thanks Th.). Which by itself is ok, provided that the oatmeal gets eaten and the mug brought in the house in a timely manner.

Unfortunately, my wife tends to be busy, so there is always that one cup of oatmeal that did not get eaten every week that sits in the car for days on end...until you can hold the mug upside down and oatmeal and spoon remain in the cup.

My theory is that this is a psychological science experiment going on and that I am the lab rat. After all, I get to clean up this mess. There has been a couple of occasions where I have put water in the mugs, came back a hour later, and witnessed obvious fermentation occuring. Oatmeal beer anyone?

Don't get me wrong---I love my wife. But I do not think that she should be performing experiments with oatmeal. If I am not allowed to have a physical alchemy lab, then she should not be allowed to perform experiments on her husband's tolerance threshold limits using breakfast foods.

And then there was today...for some reason, she thought it was a good idea to pour the oatmeal into her purse. (Ok, I know it was an accident...I hope...I haven't talked to her about it yet.) I think that we hit my threshold---I refuse to clean the oatmeal off the remaining checks and notebooks. She can get herself another lab rat or monkey.

As always, you can leave comments pointing out how heartless I am in the comment sections. But please, do not leave her any encouragement to continue this weird experiment...think of me, the poor lab monkey who has to clean this stuff up.


Susanne Iles said...

hahaha...great post for a lab monkey. I think the idea is to actually eat the oatmeal before you have to clean it up. C'mon...oatmeal is good for you. (maybe they should be baked into cookies instead...much easier way to get oatmeal down in the morning... :)

Susanne Iles said...

You know that last post was written with love. I've been known to foist oatmeal on unwilling victims too many times to count.

Soror FSO said...

Here's a great oatmeal recipe, if you think oatmeal normally tastes like crap (but as your wife notes oatmeal is very good for you =brain power, great digestive health

1 cup rolled oats
1 cup milk
raisins, freshly cut apples or pears

Mix together and let it sit in the refrigerator overnight. When you you wake up all you need to do is add sugar and cinnamon or brown sugar and maple syrup, warm it up and off to yum yum land with zero preparation in the morning and a great brain on your shoulders to head off the day

And for the breaking of the oatmeal science experiment trend

Breakfast cookies
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup light corn syrup or whole foods substitute
2 cups cheerios (I like the whole wheat or organic versions)
1 cup peanut butter

combine sugar and syrup in a pan and bring to a full boil, remove from heat stir in cheerios and peanut butter, form balls and place on wax paper until cool

My son devours these, I like to add some ground flax seed (its relatively tasteless) to make it healthy...then it has protein, whole wheat, and omega 3 fatty acids! You just grab and go!

Soror FSO said...

p.s Sorry I thought Susanne was your wife until I saw she was from Ireland!